


if this is my way, hold my hand

by youngjo



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: M/M, Marriage Proposal, Soft sex, just something short & soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:34:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22061896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youngjo/pseuds/youngjo
Summary: It wasn't extravagant or elegant, but it suited them—and that was all that mattered.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 20
Kudos: 192





	if this is my way, hold my hand

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted to write a soft little seongjoong thing,, it's nothing exciting but I hope you like it regardless!

The world beyond their window was quiet, the fall of snow swallowing up any sort of sound. Anyone brave enough to venture into the cold winter air had long-since reached their destination, spending their New Year’s Eve with friends or family.

Hongjoong and Seonghwa had opted to stay home instead. They had plenty of invitations for various activities, make no mistake there, but something about staying home carried more appeal than trudging through slick snowy sidewalks. So after an evening spent sipping hot chocolate and watching leftover Christmas movies together, Seonghwa had carried Hongjoong to their bed and tucked both of them into cool blankets. Legs tangled together, they laid there in silence for a bit, just taking in each other’s features while the snow continued to fall outside.

Hongjoong broke the silence first. "You make me recall memories I've never had," he said suddenly, tracing idle patterns into Seonghwa’s collarbones.

"Is that a good thing?" Seonghwa whispered, fingertips ghosting along Hongjoong's temple.

"They're good memories, I think." Hongjoong inhaled softly. "Like feelings of a life I never had. Or, maybe, a future—a future I'd like to spend with you." 

"I would like that." He cupped Hongjoong's cheek, their eyes meeting. The streetlight beyond the window illuminated the glow of searching gazes between them. "You make my life worth living."

Hongjoong’s heart clenched in his chest. He’d never been the greatest at expressing his feelings but Seonghwa had never took issue with that. His ‘I love yous’ did not come verbally. They came through his actions. They came in how Hongjoong knew exactly how to prepare Seonghwa’s breakfast in the morning. They came in how Hongjoong hugged him a little tighter when he knew Seonghwa was feeling down. They came in Hongjoong’s kisses, soft and tender against his lips before they slept. They came in how Hongjoong picked up on Seonghwa’s subtle anxiety in crowds and how he would rub his back to calm him down. There were many little ways Hongjoong showed he loved him.

“Kim Hongjoong, I want nothing more than to spend a lifetime with you,” Seonghwa murmured. His face sat bare, exposing every little emotion he had to offer; he had always worn his heart on his sleeve after all. “I wanted to be romantic, to whisk you away on a trip to a far off land we’ve never seen before, but …” The man worried at his lip and Hongjoong saw a shimmer of tears within his eyes. “I feel this suits both of us.” He sat up, untangling himself from Hongjoong’s body; the latter whined in protest but Seonghwa just smiled. “It’s worth it, I promise.”

Hongjoong had a feeling, deep down, about what Seonghwa was planning. But he purposefully kept the thought at bay, instead throwing all of his attention into watching Seonghwa rummage around their bedroom in search of something. Hongjoong took the opportunity to sit upright, pulling their blanket tighter around his shoulders to combat the cool air.

“Oh!” He found what he was looking for, crawling back to the bed. Seonghwa leaned against the mattress, concealing something beneath both of his hands and just staring up at him. “Kim Hongjoong,” he began, “There’s something I want to ask you.”

The world shrank suddenly, revolving around the two of them completely. Hongjoong extended a hand and slotted it over Seonghwa’s; the latter smiled.

“We’ve been dating for three years now. We’ve traveled the world with each other and I’ve been able to experience so many new things at your side.” Seonghwa pulled his hand from beneath Hongjoong’s and grasped it between his fingers, rubbing gently. “I want to spend forever with you, not just until we’re old and grey and I can finally forget your awful milkshakes.”

“Excuse you, my milkshakes are great!” Hongjoong protested and Seonghwa laughed.

“I’m just teasing, Hongjoong; I wouldn’t drink them otherwise.” Seonghwa let go of his hand, and Hongjoong’s eyes trailed after the motion. After a bit of shuffling, he produced a tiny little black box. Hongjoong’s mouth went dry at the sight, but not from fear. Seonghwa popped it open, revealing a silver ring. The stone in the center caught just enough of the light from outside to glitter green and Hongjoong couldn’t stop his gasp of awe—it was an emerald. 

“You didn’t …” He whispered, hands hovering over the box shakily. Hongjoong didn’t know why he was so afraid to touch it.

“I did; diamonds don’t suit you.” Seonghwa lifted it so Hongjoong could get a better look. “Kim Hongjoong, will you do me the honor of marrying me?” 

Hongjoong’s vision went hazy with tears. He sniffled, rubbing at his eyes. “I don’t have anything elegant to say,” he replied quietly, “Not like you, Hwa. But … you—you’re all I want. You’re all I  _ need,  _ and I love you. I know I don’t say it often enough, and yet you’re still here wanting to marry me and … and I just …” He trailed off, fighting his way through the tears now running hotly down his cheeks.

Seonghwa cooed softly, setting the ring down so he could move Hongjoong’s hands away and cup his cheeks. Leaning up, he kissed away his tears and rubbed their noses together. “You show me you love me everyday, Hongjoong. When you laugh, when you smile, when you hug me—you don’t have to say it for me to know. Your own way of showing it is enough.”

Hongjoong pressed their heads together, arms coming up to wrap around his neck. Seonghwa accepted the invitation and hugged him tightly, just holding him as he waded through a river of emotions. 

“Yes,” he whispered after a minute or two. “I’ll marry you. I want to be with you forever.”

“I would move mountains for you, Hongjoong. I love you.” He kissed him then, cutting off any reply Hongjoong may have offered. His hands trailed down the shorter man’s body, grasping his hips with strong fingers. Seonghwa prompted Hongjoong to lay back, sliding a knee between his thighs and leaning ever further over him. He pulled away only enough to allow their eyes to meet. “I’m glad you only wore boxers tonight.”

Hongjoong wasn’t sure why such a mundane phrase made him so weak in the knees. Seonghwa seemed to have that effect on him though, no matter what he did. 

Seonghwa touched him with more care than ever that evening, despite both of them knowing Hongjoong could handle so much more. He fingered him open until Hongjoong could do nothing but cling to him and whine desperately, one leg slung over his waist and the other shaking weakly upon his chest. Only when Seonghwa deemed him ready, despite the two of them sleeping with each other nearly every other night, did he finally give him what he wanted. He fucked into him slow and gentle, holding Hongjoong against his chest and murmuring soft ‘I love yous’ into his ear. They managed to find euphoria together, Seonghwa kissing the air from Hongjoong’s lungs and holding him like he may never get to again.

“I will give you everything,” Hongjoong managed to whisper, ear pressed to Seonghwa’s chest so he could hear his heartbeat.

“But I already have it,” Seonghwa replied, kissing his temple. “You’re already within my arms.”

**Author's Note:**

> as always, find me on twt [@moonswallowed](https://twitter.com/moonswallowed) !!


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